Regular readers of this and my previous blog (Pixie’s Diary)
will know that one of my favourite pastimes is spending time up on the roof of my
boat. It’s especially enjoyable when the sun is shining and I can roll about to
my hearts content on the warm steel and feel all scrummy and nice. Except, that
at the moment, there’s a problem. You see the humans, being so inept, have
moored my boat under a lot of trees. ‘What’s wrong with that Pixie?’ I
hear you ask. Well I’ll tell you. There’s plenty wrong with it. In a nutshell
it means that my roof is constantly coated in detritus of all manner.
There’s twigs, blossom, leaves, berries, sap… the list could go on. How can I
possibly roll around with all that lot up there? But the worst of it is the
blasted, bloody pigeons that have deemed to make their home in said trees (you
can guess where this is going can’t you?). Yes gentle reader, the dirty
bastards poo all over my roof. It’s everywhere! You can’t move up there
for pigeon shit! And I’m not prepared to put up with it much longer.
However…
I overheard Ange telling the lummox that she’s going to get
up there tomorrow and clean it. About bloody time too if you ask me, and what’s
that portly oaf going to be doing as well? He needs to get his fat arse in gear
and get up there to do his bit too. Honestly, you’d think they had nothing
better to do with their time. They spend their weekends sleeping or gadding
about or pissing it up and all the while I can’t go onto my roof for fear of
sullying my gorgeous pads with pigeon feces. I just hope they crack on and do a
decent job of it so that I can crack on and enjoy myself. Anyway, I’ve said my
piece now and Ange sounds determined so I’ll just wait and see if she comes
good and does it. And as for those pigeons, if they get close enough…
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