Bliss!

Oh it’s sheer bliss gentle reader. Absolute bliss. The lummox is going to be away for a whole week, maybe even longer. They’ve started bringing my boat back up the river to where there are new moorings at Shipley. I shall of course be ruling the place in no time at all. But before then there’s the small matter of them fetching the boat. Last weekend they managed to get it a paltry twenty miles as far as Castleford. That’s still a long way from Shipley so guess what? The lummox has had to stay with the boat to look after it for me. Oh joy, oh bliss.

That means that we won’t have him arsing about the place belching, farting, snoring and making the air in the bathroom unbreatheable. The caravan will sound and smell a lot better in his absence that’s for sure. Also it means that I’ll get Ange all to myself and can get as much fuss off her as I like without having his dirty great mitts pawing at me like a gorilla with a pineapple. It’s going to be great. I’ll have more of the bed at night and can burrow my way under the covers to cosy up to Ange without being deafened by his constant grunts and noisy inhalations.

I suppose I ought to be grateful to him in a way. I mean, he is looking after my boat for me but also for the wonderful opportunity to have a great week without him being here. So cheers lummox. See you whenever!

PPP x